Let’s Talk About Procrastination…Eh, Mabey Later.

Words of Wisdom: Weekly wit from the man who's done (almost) everything wrong!

By: Sean Weeks

With Valentine’s day almost here, we’re sure to see many people scrambling last minute to get gifts for their partner because they didn’t plan ahead. We all procrastinate sometimes. It’s human nature and can be unavoidable because of circumstances. For some, however, procrastination is a way of life and is a major roadblock to success and a healthy relationship.

When procrastination is an issue in our lives, we miss out. We miss out on meeting important deadlines and goals in our lives. We hurt those around us by not meeting our commitments. We set ourselves back in our careers by not being reliable. We damage ourselves by stunting our personal growth. When it comes to our relationships and spouses, we can cause great hurt to them and damage to our relationships. In this, the week before Valentine’s Day, let’s focus on how procrastination can negatively affect our partner and our relationships.

We all know the stress and anxiety caused by waiting until the last minute to get a gift or card or plan a trip for a big day such as a birthday or Valentine’s Day. When we wait until last minute, we are doing our beloved a disservice. We are not giving them our full effort. We are not taking the time to love them on their terms. We are not living up to our commitment to be the best we can be for them, and they pick up on that. When it is seen, or even perceived by our spouse that we waited or half-assed a big day, it makes our spouse feel unloved. It can bring up feelings in them of abandonment or that they are just an afterthought, rather than our priority. They can’t help but project that perceived lack of caring into all other aspects of the relationship. And, to be fair, we are NOT making our partner the priority in our lives.

Procrastination, much like complacency, can be a relationship-killer. The remedy to procrastination, much like the remedy to complacency, is intentionality. When our mind is telling us we need to put something off, we need to counter this by intentionally planning ahead. We need to get into some action-steps to move toward our goal. When it comes to Valentine’s day, this means keeping an open ear for hints and suggestions throughout the year that your partner may drop about what they may want or what would mean a lot to them. It means possibly having an open, honest conversation about what types of gifts are really appreciated and what types of gifts are probably NOT a good idea. Being intentional and avoiding procrastination about Valentine’s day also means planning ahead with enough time to put it all together before the big day. All this intentionality will have the effect of making your partner feel like the most important thing in your life. It will make them feel loved, thought about, and taken care of.

That is what Valentine’s Day is supposed to be about after all, isn’t it? We want our spouse to feel loved and appreciated. We want them to feel taken care of. No one ever feels those things when presented with a thrown-together, half-assed, last-minute gift. They want to know that you put effort and thought into loving them. More importantly, it shows them that you are reliable and that you take your commitments seriously. Valentine’s Day is about love, which is a choice, and showing that love to your partner. It is not about feeling obligated to get your partner something because society says you have to. Treat them like your priority on that special day, but take your intentionality and apply it to your relationship throughout the year. That way, they know they are a priority ALL the time.

Have a great, romantic Valentine’s Day and show your partner that they can be Confident in your love for them!

Want more? Listen to the episode “Perfectly Imperfect Marriages AND a bonus The Ultimate Gift Guide, A foolproof way for gift giving on any occasion!”